The death of a loved one causes all sorts of feelings. Usually you would like things to go smoothly and family to get along, but emotions run high at a time like this and often that leads to fighting and problems. This is especially true when it comes time to divvy up a deceased family member’s estate.
Here are just five of the common problems you might experience with a family’s inheritance.
1. Personal Belongings
Dividing up the jewelry and furniture of a family member’s estate often leads to someone being upset. If there is no clear-cut list that says so and so gets this, and this goes to that person in the will, then this is often a sore spot and point of contention for most families when a loved one dies.
Having a personal property memorandum in the will that is clear and thorough will help prevent some hurt feelings and fighting amongst family members.
2. Who’s the Responsible Party?
Whether you’re leaving behind a business, a property or a family member who needs help, these are all areas that cause problems after someone’s passing. So having open and frank discussions with family to see who is willing to be the responsible party after your passing is important to do in advance.
If you have a disabled child who needs care, for example, then it’s important to arrange for that care. Whether that means a family member will take over that care, or will become financially responsible, needs to be clear. If you have a family business, you need to decide if there is anyone in the family willing to take it over, or if it should be sold as part of your estate.
3. Divorce
Yes, even in death divorce is a source of contention. Biological children, stepchildren, exes, current spouse… they all want to lay claim. A prenuptial agreement can help sort out these types of conflicts.
4. Funeral Details
Planning and paying for a funeral is often a source of contention amongst families. Who’s going to pay for the funeral (assuming there’s no life insurance policy that covers its full cost)? What should be done – an open casket, burial, or cremation? If you pre-arrange your funeral, then you can often get a better price for the funeral and it will be just what you want, not what your loved ones believe that you would have wanted.
5. Disinheritance
No one really wants to disinherit a loved one, especially one’s own child. And no one wants to be the one disinherited. Disinheritance should not be taken lightly either. You can’t threaten to take a child out of the will just for doing something you don’t like. This is going to cause plenty of probation issues at the end of the day.
An inheritance should be given out equally to children regardless of what has been done. A child who worked hard all his (or her) life and is doing well does not deserve to receive less of an inheritance simply because he doesn’t “need” the inheritance.
Conversely, you should not punish a child in death by giving him the shaft because he didn’t live up to be what you thought he had the potential of being. It’s best to just give out the inheritance in equal amounts unless there’s a really good reason not to, like someone who’s an addict.
Avoiding conflict in death is a difficult thing to do, but dealing with these five things will go a long way to helping prevent many arguments that often arise in families after a death. You can only do so much, but hopefully your family will do the rest and remember the good times you all had as a family rather than dwell on things outside of their control.
